ANYA
This is the man that i plan to entangle - isn't he fine
My claim to fame was to maim and to mangle -
Vengeance was mine
But I'm out of the biz
The name I made I'll trade for his
The only trouble is ....
I'll never tell

XANDER
She is the one, she's such wonderful fun
Such passion and grace
Warm in the night when I'm right in her tight
- embrace, tight embrace
I'll never let her go
The love we've known can only grow
There's just one thing that - no
I'll never tell

ANYA/XANDER
Cause there's nothing to tell

ANYA
He snores

XANDER
She Wheezes

ANYA
Say "housework" and he freezes

XANDER
She eats these skeezy cheeses
That I can't desribe

ANYA
I talk - he breezes

XANDER
She doesn't know what "please" is

ANYA
His p____ got diseases from a chumash tribe

XANDER/ANYA
The vibe
Gets kind of scary

XANDER
Like she thinks I'm ordinary

ANYA
Like it's all just temporary

XANDER
Like her toes are kind of hairy

XANDER/ANYA
But it's all very well
Cause God knows I'll never tell

ANYA
When things get rough he just hides behind his Buffy
Now look he's getting huffy cause he knows that I know

XANDER
She clings, she's needy, she's also really greedy, she never

ANYA
-His eyes are beady!

XANDER
This is my verse, hello
She-

ANYA
Look at me! I'm dancing crazy!

XANDER/ANYA
You know

XANDER
You're quite the charmer

ANYA
My knight in armor

XANDER
You're the cutest of the s_____es
With your lips as red as rubies
And your firm yet subtle-tight embrace

ANYA
He's swell

XANDER
She's sweller

ANYA
He'll always be my feller

XANDER
That's why I'll never tell her
That I'm petrified

ANYA
I've read this tale, There's wedding then betrayal
I know that come the day I'll want to run and hide

XANDER/ANYA
I Lied
I said it's easy
I've tried
But there's these fears I can't quell

XANDER
Is she looking for a pot of gold

ANYA
Will I look good when I've gotten old

XANDER
Will our lives become to stressfull if I'm never that succesful

ANYA
When I get so old and wrinkly that I look like David Brinkley

XANDER
Am I crazy

ANYA
Am I dreaming

XANDER
Am I marrying a demon

XANDER/ANYA
We could clearly raise the beam in making marriage a hell
So thank God I'll never tell
I swear that I'll never tell

XANDER
My lips are sealed

ANYA
I take the fifth

XANDER
Nothing to see move it along

XANDER/ANYA
I'll never tell

See also:
JustSomeLyrics
53
53.92
Can Man Named Joe Lyrics
Steel Pulse There Must Be A Way Lyrics