17. Mr Mistoffeless Lyrics
You ought to ask Mr. Mistoffelees
The original Conjuring Cat
The greatest magicians have something to learn
From Mr. Mistoffelees's conjuring turn
And you'll all say:
Oh! Well I never! Was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
He is quiet and small
He is black
From the ears to the tip of his tail
He can creep through the tiniest crack
He can walk on the narrowest rail
He can pick any card from a pack
He is equally cunning with dice
He is always decieving you into believing
That he's only hunting for mice
He can play any trick with a cork
Or a spoon and a bit of fish paste
If you look for a knife or a fork
And you think it was merely misplaced
You have seen it one moment, and then it is gone!
But you find it next week lying out on the lawn!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never! Was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
Oh! Well I never! Was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
His manner is vague and aloof
You would think there was nobody shyer
But his voice has been heard on the roof
When he was curled up by the fire
And he's sometimes been heard by the fire
When he was about on the roof
(At least we all heard that somebody purred)
Which is uncontestable proof
Of his singular magical powers
And I've known the family to call
Him in from the garden for hours
When he was asleep in the hall
And not long ago this phenomenal cat
Produced seven kittens right out of a hat!
And we all say:
Oh! Well I never! Was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
Oh! Well I never! Was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
Ladies and gentlemen
I give you the marvelous
Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
Presto!
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