Hey man, just roll me another Christmas blunt.

I was gonna trim the tree, until I got high
I was gonna buy you a DVD, but then I got high
My presents ain't wrapped up, and I know why
'Cause I got high
Because I got high
Because I got high

I was gonna hang my lights before I got high
I was supposed to book my grandma's flight, but then I got high
She's sleepin' at LAX, and I know why
'Cause I got high
Because I got high
Because I got high

I was gonna send you a card, but I got high
Put a lighted reindeer in my yard, but I got high
My jack-o-lantern's frozen, its still outside
'Cause I get high
Because I get high
'Cause I get high

I was gonna clean the chimney flue, but then I got high
I was gonna roll up a fatty too for the fat guy
I drank his milk and cookies, and I know why
'Cause I got high
Because I got high
Because I got high

I was gonna go to midnight mass while I was high
I was gonna sit there and pass some gas while I was high
Now I'll burn in Hell, and I know why
'Cause I got high
Because I got high
Because I got high

I was gonna kiss my grandmas face, and then I got high
I was gonna eat her fruit cake too, then I got high
It tasted pretty nasty, but I don't mind
Because I was high
Because I was high
Because I was high

I'm messin with Christmas songs because I'm high
I hope Afroman don't take this wrong because he's high
If I get a call from his attorney, well I know why
So he can get high
So he can get high
So he can get high

Hey is he really high?

Yeah, he's high.

Fa la lalala s_____ do da
Yeah, he really is high
Snoop snoop doggy do wah
Flippy de bird at you all
La da da da dah de dah
Doggy doo doo
Say mutt?
Say mutt?
Say mutt?

So all you kids, be real good, make your bed

That's fantastic advice for all the children.

Hey man we screwed this up big time. OK?
When grandma hears this, ooh man, I'm outta the will, ok?

No more sweet potato pie, brother.

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