Oh by the way, hey did you know,
Tomorrow night, we're playin bingo
Its a beautiful sight we're goin bowling tonight
We're walkin in a Essex wonderland.

Down the plant, we got the day off
Cuz the foreman got his payoff
We're drinkin all day, then whizzin away
We're walkin in a Essex wonderland.

Let me tell ya somethin at this time hon
Essex is da only way to be
While your at it you should get your hair done
And bleach it blonde so all the folks'll see.

We're gettin Hazel ta make some eggnog
In the fireplace, we'll burn a fake log
Little Butchie will cry, he don't like pumpkin pie
We're walkin in a Essex wonderland

Joey's home from the service
and his girlfriend is gettin nervous
While he was at sea, she contracted VD
They're walkin in a Essex wonderland.

You can make an ornament from a Bud Can
And then yous can hang it from the tree
'Sherry are you pregnant?,' she'll say, 'No Man
But I'm thirteen so ain't it time to be?'

We're callin Donnie up in jail
We're raising money to post his bail
Our neighbor is cranked and uncle Jimmy is tanked
We're walkin in a Essex wonderland (2x)

Happy Holidays, Hon!

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