Apologetix Somebody Sold Me Lyrics

Parody of "Somebody Told Me" by The Killers
(Genesis 37-50)

Take a ride back to the olden days
17 that's when I had to ditch this place
And Jacob's my dad, guess you know his name
He had me named Joseph and gave nice gifts
Anyway, folks, I don't think you'd like this
Got heavenly clothes and the day I did
I had 11 angry bros, better play nice, kids
Sprang a trap now to bring me back down to size
Never thought I'd meet Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice

But somebody sold me -- not Reuben or Benjamin
But Judah and Simeon
Levi, Gad and Zebulun, Dan and Naphtali
Issachar and Asher
Now, I've got my masters

Then I got sold off to someone new
Ran his household but his sleazy wife's untrue
She said to me, Joe, give me just one kiss
I said, for Heaven's sake, no, but she claimed I did
Prison block now, had me locked down for life
Never thought I'd see my dreams come true in all this strife

But someone paroled me by divine appointment
It went like a whirlwind
Then I helped the Pharaoh when he had bad dreams
He thought my potential -- was quite substantial
My life turned-a life turned around

Take a tip from me: I said, maybe things look bleak
But you just don't know now what God is gonna do in time

Yes, somebody sold me 'cause I annoyed them
It looked like my world's end
Now I have a federal job with the brass here
It's not penitential; it's vice presidential
I boss men-a boss men around

Yes, somebody sold me and broke up our boy band
It felt more like Pearl Jam
Cause I was depressed but now it's a blast here
It was providential and quite essential
My life turned-a life turned around

Yes, somebody sold me, if you haven't listened
I walk like an Egyptian
Cause I had been sent to there in the past, yes
It's right there in Genesis chapter 37, kids
My life turned-a life turned around
Genesis 50:20-21
You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don't be afraid. I will provide for you and your children." And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.