Ivor Bigun I'm A Wanker Lyrics
My mother said
that I never should
never play with the naughty rude girls in the wood
Their giggling talk I could never understood
And thats why I fell in love with my right hand
(Chorus)
And thats why
I'm a w___er
I'm a w___er
And does it good like it b_____ well should
I'm a w___er
I'm a w___er
And im always pulling my pudd
I was 25 years old
before I was kissed
and then I found the guy prefered
a swift one off the wrist
Its cheap and convenient
and you cant catch VD
Its avalible at anytime and its absolutly free
(Chorus)
And thats why
I'm a w___er
I'm a w___er
And it does me good like it b_____ well should
I'm w___er
I'm a w___er
and im always pulling my pudd
Oh Mrs Palm
and your 5 lovely daughters
Thank you for having me
and being oh so kind
I've got pains in my arms
and my donkeys growing shorter
My knees have turnt to water
And I think im going blind
I've w___ed over Italy
I've w___ed over Spain
I've w___ed in an omibus
I've even had a w___ in a train
I've used a badger
and a melon
and a cat
a inflatable Linda Lovelace
and a David Crocket hat
(Chorus)
And thats why
I'm a w___er
I'm a w___er
and it does me good like it b_____ well should
I'm a w___er
I'm a w___er
and im always pulling my pudd
Oh Mrs Palm
and your 5 lovely daughters
Thank you for having me
and being oh so kind
I've pains in my arms
and my donkeys growing shorter
My knees have turnt to water
And I think im going blind
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