Dear Boss I write this note to you,
to tell you of my plight.
And at the time of writing,
I am not a pretty sight.
My body is all black and blue,
my face a deadly grey,
And I hope you'll understand
why Patty's not at work today.

I was working on the 14th floor,
some bricks I had to clear,
And throwing down 'em from such a height
was not a good idea,
The foreman was unpleasent,
he being an awful sot,
And he said I'd have to take them down
the ladder by hand.

Well clearing all these bricks by hand,
it was so awful slow.
So I hoisted up a barrel and
secured a rope below.
But in my haste to do the job,
I was too blind to see,
That a barrel full of building bricks,
was heavier than me.

So I went down to cut the rope, and
the barrel fell like lead.
And clinging tightly to the rope,
I started up instead.
I shot up like a rocket,
and to my surprise I found,
That halfway up I met the b_____
barrel coming down.

Well the barrel struck my shoulder
as to the ground it speed,
And when I reached the top
I hit the pulley with my head,
I spun around all stunned and shocked
from this almighty blow,
While the barrel spilled out half the bricks,
14 floors below.

Now when these bricks had fallen from the
barrel to the floor,
I then outweighed the barrel and I
started down once more,
Still clinging tightly to the rope,
I headed toward ground,
And fell upon the building bricks
that were all scattered 'round.

Now as soon as I had hit the ground,
I thought I'd passed the worst,
When the barrel hit the pulley,
and then the bottom burst,
A shower of bricks fell down on me,
I hadn't got a hope,
And as I was losing consciousness,
I let go of the b_____ rope.

Well the barrel now being heavier,
it started down once more,
Struck across me smartly
as I lie there on the floor,
It broke some ribs and my left arm
and I can only say,
I hope you'll understand why,
Patty's not at work today.

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