Mike Doughty Frog and Banjo Lyrics

There are many sad things,
Like a child drowning in a vat of molasses,
(How would a child end up in a vat of molasses?...)
Or if you were to lose the phone number of someone you find intriguing,
(I'm sure it's in the laundry...)
Or a phone that keeps ringing and ringing and ringing and no one will answer,
(???...)
Sad like a zero on the LED display of your answering machine,
(Saaaaad...That's a very melancholy numeral.)
Sad like a photograph of your grandfather at the age of twenty-seven,
But I believe, and I believe strongly,
(He's trying to make a point here...)
There is nothing sadder than
A frog plucking a banjo.
(Froooooooooogg...)
That's about as sad as you can be,
A frog plucking a banjo.
Let us contemplate the sadness,
(???...)
Of a banjo playing frog,
Let us examine the sadness,
It's extremely sad,
(When the banjo is plucked by the frog...)
Frog playing a banjo.
(Frog plucking a banjo...)
Is the frog aware that he is sad?
(I believe that he is aware...)
Well, I'm not so sure you're correct about that.
(Why is that?)
I really--don't--think a frog that plays a banjo is quite so self-aware.
(I beliiieeevvee...)
Is there anything quite so sad?
(A froooooooooggg playing a banjo...)

See also:

85
85.39
Beach Boys The Monster Mash Lyrics
Beatles I Want Hold Your Hand Lyrics