Kelly No Booty Calls Lyrics

Hello?
[Hey it's your ex]
It's one in the morning, what the hell do you want?
[Baby I'm h____]
Oh, so what are you saying, you want to get together?
[I want you to come over all dressed up in leather
like you used to do]
Back in 02!
[You give me nice dreams, make me want to scream ooh,
ooh, ooh!]
That's not happening again, that was back then
and now I'm interested in bigger and better men

No booty calls!
Deck!
No booty calls!
Deck! That's not happening!

[Aw, Kelly, I still got it goin on
I know you're hot to trot, and I'm warm for your form]
Wow, with clichés like that I'm really torn
Your game is played, go back to your p___
[You start me up, you make a dead man come]
Then you can just drop dead, cause you ain't gettin
some
[What happened to the freak who used to rock my world?]
Well, the freak's still here, but she's not your girl
You broke up with me
[I made a mistake]
So why don't you just ask me out on a date?
[Uh, cuz, uh, tonight's fate]
Please.

No booty calls!
Deck!
No booty calls!
That's not happening!

[Remember when I hit it in the parking lot]
Outside of IHOP?
[Yeah, that was so hot]
Thank you, I'm flattered, but it doesn't matter
I remember that you threw up in the pancake batter
You've got a problem, you're drunk all the time
are even you sure that this phone number's mine?
[Uh, yeah I...wait, what?]
If that confused you, I'm gonna have to lose you
go back to first grade and get yourself a Blue's clue
I don't even know whatever made me choose you
[Cuz we're good together!]
But I can do better
[No one makes you wetter]
Buddy, you're like cheddar: cheesy!
White cheddar.

[You know I moved out my mom's, now I got my own crib]
That's funny, that's just where you belong; in a crib
[You sayin' I'm your baby?]
I'm saying you're A baby
[I'm not hearin' yes or no, I'm hearin' maybe]
Well get your hearing checked cuz you can't play me
[If I'm a player, hate the game, don't hate me]
That's not how that phrase goes
[I know, but you just turn me on, baby, from my head to
my toes]
Jesus Christ, could you at least be original?
If game was the truth then yours would be fictional
[Baby, I got style and I got class]
I got a brand new boot for your a__.

No booty calls!
Deck!
[Aw come on baby!]
NO! No booty calls!
That's not happening!

[Hey Kelly from the block
I don't just talk the talk
I walk the walk and I know you like my...]
Hey! Johnny come lately
Don't discombobulate me
If you want some of this you have to properly date me
[You mean wine and dine? That's a waste of time
I can spend five dollars and still get mine]
Since that's probably all you have, let me buy you a
hint
How's this: go stuff your peehole with a junior mint
[Baby all I want to do is make you sweat
Let me be Romeo to your Juliet]
OK, drink some poison and I'll stab myself
You'd know that story if you ever took a book off a
shelf
[I don't need no book]
Double negative, so you do
[My d___'s hard, look]
That's pejorative, so rude
[I don't understand all these big words you use
I don't need big words cuz I got big shoes]
Verbally you're a moron, s__ually you're a cling on
I'm more mature now, I need a mental turn on
[Baby I got brains in my underwear,
my d___ equals MC squared ooh!]
You need to go back to physics class
The only brain in your pants is your head up your a__
Check that, you know, you could be right
cause you do come faster than the speed of light
[You must admit I got a load like a stallion
and I skeet, skeet on with my creamy Italian]
Ew! what am I to you, a salad bar?
You like to skeet so much, I need a d___ sneeze guard
[You want some tonight?]
I want some never
[That's not what you said back when we were together]
Well that's not happening again, that was back then
and now I'm interested in smarter, employed men

No booty calls!
Deck!
No booty calls!
That's not happening!
No booty calls, deck, sorry...
[Oh, come on, baby, you know I'll treat you right]
No, don't interrupt me, no booty calls, OK?
[Oh, we back on that again]
Yeah, we are, because I don't want one
[Don't you want to check out my new stereo?]
I don't think so
[I know you'll like it]
Whatever
[Come on, baby, come over]
No, this phone conversation is over.

*dial tone*

Deck!