Went down to Mexico
I drove my black El Camino
I met up with an old gringo
He showed me round, and said to call him Joe
I was there about a week or so
Wound up in the general hospital
Joe said don't drink the water no more
How the hell was I supposed to know?

Drove up to San Diego
Saw a sign for Mission Beach
And so, went out deep into the ocean
Saw a shark and had a stroke
Back in the ambulance I go
Had a dream about a girl I used to know
She said "I got to warn ya bout Mexico and California"

Earthquakes and sharks to start us off
If Chupacabras ain't enough
Black widow spiders and killer bees
There ain't no shade, there ain't no trees
Black bears and heat, polluted air
There's traffic jams beyond compare
That's all I got to warn ya bout Mexico and California

Woke up and said I got to go
Doc said, "Relax, just take it slow"
I tried to argue, but don't you know
Bout California and Mexico?
Right then, the doctor hit the floor
The building shook, then shook some more
I looked down at him and swore,
"You son of a b____! I told you so!"

Earthquakes and sharks to start us off
If Chupacabras ain't enough
Black widow spiders and killer bees
There ain't no shade, there ain't no trees
Black bears and heat, polluted air
There's traffic jams beyond compare
That's all I got to warn ya bout Mexico and California

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