(Triumph)
All right. How many of you remember a show called...The TV Funhouse?
Well we've got a surprise, for those of you who give a s___.
My good friend, bring him on here, EL DOUG!!!!!

Doug, how are you doing?

(Doug)
Well I really miss the Anipals.

(Triumph)
Oh, thats so sweet. And who's your favorite animal? Yes?

(Doug)
Well I have a song I want to sing about my favorite animal.

(Triumph)
YES???!!

(Doug)
Yeah, a little guy named Benji.

(Triumph)
f___ YOU!!!!!

(Doug)
He goes on an adventure, and he always saves the day.
That why we love our Benji.

(Triumph)
Even though we know he's gay!
Oh yes.
Benjis gay, Benjis queer.
He takes his doggy bones from the rear.
He laps up j__z like Norm drank beer.
And thats how we know that Benjis queer.

(Doug)
Why are you saying that? Triumph, Benjis not gay.

(Triumph)
Have you been living under a rock? Just keep going.

(Doug)
He saved his kidnapped owner, and he saved pups from a flood.

(Triumph)
He always gets a b____, from his poster of Air Bud.
Oh yes.
Benjis queer, Benjis gay.
He sees 2 b____ and he barks "HOORAY!!!!"
He gave head to the s___gy DA.
And thats how we know that Benjis gay.

(Doug)
You know, Triumph I think you're being a little bitter.

(Triumph)
Bitter? Who's bitter? I'm just stating a simple fact.

(Doug)
But it's a terrible thing to say about Benji.

(Triumph)
Now Doug listen. Compared to what other dogs do, what these famous
celebrity dogs do, its pretty soft.

(Doug)
Really?

(Triumph)
Yes. Doug, It's the famous ones its like perv city. Take a listen.
Eddie from Frasier pays a pug, and watches him f___ his wife.
And Beethoven can only come when he's gasping for his life.
Now Old Yeller, liked his golden showers, that how he got his name.
And Spuds bangs dogs that were put to sleep, then spews from his own shame.

(Doug)
Wowza!!

(Triumph)
Yeah, pretty ugly isnt it?

(Doug)
Yeah.

(Triumph)
So you see, its not so bad.....that.........

(Both)
Benjis queer, Benjis gay.
He sees 2 b____ and he barks "HOORAY!!!!"
He served more c___ than a Chick-Fil-A.
Its totally fine that Benjis gay.

(Triumph)
GOOD GOD HES QUEER!!!!!

See also:
JustSomeLyrics
98
98.11
Die Cheerleader Die Crotch Lyrics
Christmas Songs Boys to Men Lyrics