David Allan Cole The Vibrator Queen Lyrics

Well she ordered it from a magazine
I guess for about ten bucks
And it came by special delivery
in a plain brown cardboard box
Well she opened it and inspected it
(Someone in the audience yell's " How long was it")
(David answered " Bout twelve inches long")
Well she went and dipped it in her Crisco can
And turned that sum-a-b____ on
Well she hummed and a wiggled, squirmed and giggled
Collapsed into utter pleasures

(Chorus)

She's a Vibrator Queen
She's in love with a machine
She swears it's an American dream
AC/DC try it and you'll see
It's guaranteed to make you cream in your jeans

Well she fell in love with what she had bought
A 12 - inch wonder that the mailman had brought
But through her love she could not see,
What a terrible fate there was to be.
Well she found her answer to all of her dreams
In a battery operated s__ machine
Man nor beast could take it's place
She was destined to die with a smile on her face

(Chorus)

She's a Vibrator Queen
She's in love with a machine
She swears it's an American dream
AC/DC try it and you'll see
It's guaranteed to make you cream in your jeans

One day while she was in the bath
She decided poorly,
To do her thing in the water
She paid no mind to that caution sign
That old AC current got her
Now people say, for miles around
They can still hear that d____ a hummin
But 'at's when I realized she cant be dead
Hell! Her a__ must still be c__min

(Chorus - twice)

She's a Vibrator Queen
She's in love with a machine
She swears it's an American dream
AC/DC try it and you'll see
It's guaranteed to make you cream in your jeans