ApologetiX Choirboy (parody of "Cowboy" By Kid Rock) Lyrics

Well I'm uh back in the fourth grade and I'm uh 10 I guess
When weird women thought we kids all lived to take tests
Kinda kept to myself - real shy kid
I liked old rock songs and the pop'lar hits
There was a kid talkin' 'bout a choir they got
Said a lot of the spots were not locked because
The guy who taught with the choir was still fillin' the rows
And lots of kids couldn't sound the notes
And he told me it's fun to sing with the choir
Get known as a kid that God set apart
Said to me you wanna? I'm gonna go
Try out for the choir fella you should come along
Start attendin' church service in robes just like Jesus
And get a spot in the Four Tops or Four Seasons
That rocks! Cause I'm a real good voice
And I'm takin' that test, sucka, because
I'm gonna be a choirboy baby
With a top 10 smash and the nuns all smiling
(Choirboy baby) Guess who's chillin' with the boys' choir
(I'm gonna be a choirboy baby)
Shinin' my light while the people pray
(Choirboy baby) A cappella singer from a higher plane
I let him hear my little vocals and he said, "You're in"
I go "Ah ah ah ah ah" - I dusted my friend
Told him "You won't do - there's no gown in your size"
Well that's his loss - my gown it fits fine
They told me "Believe in Jesus Christ"
I'll get Him after this part of my exciting life
Cause if I time this right I'm gonna make like a Beach Boy
And let California girls know why they all need a choirboy baby
Better stop that act everyone's not buyin'
(Choirboy baby) Just like Dylan with a good voice
(I'm gonna be a choirboy baby)
Hidin' my life while I seem O.K.
(Choirboy baby) I can tell a fib with a smiley face
Yeah it rocked - you can call me "blessed"
Only something's missin' and I gotta confess
Seems the sin that's in my head is growin' wild and fast
And it'd get this kid kicked right out of Mass
No kidding I'm sittin' in church gettin' real bored
Call the cops 'cause I'm lost
Where's the cross and the Lord?
Felt remorse and embarrassed and I tried to get right
Felt like hangin' down my head and hangin' up my life (Huh!)
Got famous - rocked the eleventh grade 'cause
Director picked me for my senior play yes
Got to wear make-up - rock band came up
They told me sing lead but then the band breaks up
Pride had got a grip on me
Robbed me of the sort of faith I'd need
I didn't know Jesus - I just would beg Him for favors
Finally straight out of college I made Him my Savior
Now life's a pleasure - this guy's legit
I'd always heard that Christians were radical idiots
I make it my biz to dispel that notion
And keep on trustin' Him with all my devotion
(Choirboy) with a rock band that's into song rewritin'
(Choirboy) spend all my time at finding words that rhyme
(Choirboy) ridin' at night cause the gigs I play
(Choirboy) might be held at 800 miles away
(Choirboy) with ApologetiX backin' the songs I'm rhymin'
(Choirboy) with a top 10 smash and the Son's inside me.

See also:

100
100.20
Mötley Crue Ten Seconds To Love Lyrics
Peter Cetera Hold Me Til The Morning Comes Lyrics