Bo Burnham Bo Burnham - Bo Fo' Sho' Lyrics

walkin my poodles, man it never gets old
with my dogs on my leash i got b____es on the hold,
a first aids kit? thats a rhesus monkey,
i bust more nuts than a pistachio junkie!
get more a__ than a giant donkey stable,
got more lines than whitney houston's coffee table,
i get more head than grammar school lice,
i'm like a walkin glacier i'm so decked out with ice.

Did you p___ a virgin? cause that s___ is tight.
jack ain't black, barry ain't white.
i do drugs in the bedroom, lie on ur back
cause i got the pipe and you got the crack.
though i'm s__ually straight, your bound to find,
i'm mentally gay, cause i'll blow your mind.
the parents be snickerin "he shouldnt have written it"
but i'm constipated, couldnt give a s___.

chorus:
My name is bo fo sho,
a born bostonian,
aryan librarian at the WORDsmithsonian
the rap is scattered, it hides its ingenuity,
i gave it this little part to give it continuity.

the fellas say
hey moron pass the gin
cause i'm an OXYmoron breathing OXYgen
give me the bottle, i'll chug two thirds
cause you b____es know fractions speak louder than words

and the ladies say
hey fellas i'm keepin it tight and if you play ur cards right you can have me tonight
should i blow you or beat you, brass or percussion?
oh stop, PERIOD end of discussion

chorus...

walking through the garden with food at my feet, picked up the celery but dropped the beat (beet).

we're in the hood ill take what you give me
was einstein's theory good...relatively
a smart queen's kingdumb, it doesnt mix
a litter of literates, a bunch of moby d___s
"get thee to a punnery" o-just to-pheelia
take you with a condomn "stainless-steal" ya.
half a pound of turkey breast, half a pound of chicken t__s,
why are only crackers staying at the Ritz?
poverty, racism, isn't it strange,
that only the homeless are beggin for change?
i shocked Sherlock
What, son? (watson) (watt, son?)
Rosa Parks didnt call "shotgun"!
here's a bit of irony
a Ford Focus driver has ADD
How'd i come to master all these things?
like a tampon theif, i had to pull some strings.