Goldie Lookin Chain Song For Kelly Lyrics

Eggsy
I seen that film, American Pie
Where a bloke f___ed a fruit, so I gave it a try
My technique was slightly off-key
It involved tinned meat and a pop celebrity
I wouldn't ??? her if I saw her on the street
But I wanna make a statue just of Kelly for me
You know, it all started way back when
Using spam to cap? Boys II Men
I used bacon to make Rusty Lee
Kelly Osbourne, you're my meat fantasy
You're always there when I need to talk
And I love the way your fingers and your toes are made (from pork)

All
I made a corned beef Kelly Osbourne,
And I f___ed it when I was watching p___
I made a corned beef Kelly Osbourne,
And I f___ed it when I was watching p___

Maggot
Minimum content, 3% meat
I trimmed the fat off, it looked really neat
Made the torso and shaped the thighs
But I'm stuck, I've got nothing for the eyes

Billy
Fluid dripping like a running tap
When I warm my meat up and rub it on the lap

Xain
Making bacon with reformed ham
People pay money for this in Amsterdam

Mysty
Meat fantasies often give me the horn,
But nothing like a corned beef Kelly Osbourne
You're divine, so s__y, so tasty
Like meat in a pie when I penetrate the pastry

Xain
This girl I was with had a vag like corned beef
It was all smashed up and I thought it had teeth
I thought kebab was on the main course
So I covered it in my own special garlic sauce

All
I made a corned beef Kelly Osbourne,
And I f___ed it when I was watching p___
I made a corned beef Kelly Osbourne,
And I f___ed it when I was watching p___

Xain
I f___ed a corned beef Kelly Osbourne
I f___ed a corned beef Kelly Osbourne

Adam
Sit back kid, take a book outta my leaf
I love to f___ a pile of sweaty sticky beef
Down Aldi's they're looking at me funny
Twelve tins of corned beef now it's a cunny
Ooh, I'm gonna f___ you, right here, right now
Make a mess with my stiff, gonna show you how
Stick it in, watch the foreskin
Try to f___ the tin, rip my banjo string
Cos you knows I wanna f___ that prime fillet cut
With a bit of lippy dressed up like a s___
Getting down on the floor for a bit of s_______
'Til someone said "oi w___er, what you doing?"
Threw me out, I raised an objection
With corned beef still stuck to my erection
So what, f___ 'em, I don't give a toss
I'm going home with a Fray Bentos

All
I made a corned beef Kelly Osbourne,
And I f___ed it when I was watching p___
I made a corned beef Kelly Osbourne,
And I f___ed it when I was watching p___

Mysty/Xain
Meat fantasies (meaty meaty meat)
Meat fantasies (meaty meaty meat)
Meat fantasies (meaty meaty meat)
Meat fantasies
Meat fantasies

Xain
That's right, back with the rhythm
Like a Ginster's pasty covered in j___

Maggot
Meaty b____es out on a binge
I'm going home with a corned beef minge

Billy
s___ging the meat, but I ain't mincing
Hiding my eyes to stop me gagging and wincing
At the smell of the rancid spammy clam
As a steak tenderiser goes "bam bam bam!"

Mike
Madame Tussauds you got nothing on me
I got my own meatworks laboratory
All Saints and Spice Girls and miss Zeta-Jones
All I want is the meat, don't care about the bones

Eggsy
I tried s__ shops, I tried DVDs
It don't mean s___ compared to meats like these
Aspic jelly, and a coating of lard
These are the things that make my p____ go hard

All
I made a corned beef Kelly Osbourne,
And I f___ed it when I was watching p___
I made a corned beef Kelly Osbourne,
And I f___ed it when I was watching p___

Xain
I f___ed a corned beef Kelly Osbourne
I f___ed a corned beef Kelly Osbourne