'Weird Al' Yankovic Taco Grande Lyrics

Taco... grande. Taco... grande

Yo quiero chimichangas y chile colorado
Yo tengo el dinero para un steak picado
Las flautas y tamales, siempre muy bueno
Y el chile relleno

You see, I just gotta have a tostada, carne asada
That's right, I want the whole enchilada
My only addiction has to do with a flour tortilla
I need a quesadilla

I love to stuff my face with tacos al carbón
With my friends, or when I'm all alone
Yo tengo mucho hambre y ahora lo quiero
Un burrito ranchero

So give me something spicy and hot, now
Break out the menu, what you got, now?
Oh, would you tell the waiter I'd like to have sour cream on the side
You better make sure the beans are refried

Taco... grande. Taco... grande

Well, there's not a taco big enough for a man like me
That's why I order two or three
Let me give you a tip, just try a nacho chip
It's really good with bean dip

I eat uno, dos, tres, quarto burritos
Pretty soon I can't fit in my Speedos
Well, I hope they feed us lots of chicken fajitas
And a pitcher of margaritas

Well, the combination plates all come with beans and rice
The taquitos here are very nice
Now I'm down on my knees, we need some extra tomatoes and cheese
And could you make that separate checks, please?

Taco... grande. Taco... grande

"Buenos noches, senor. bienvenido a el burritos casa de salsa. tenemos muchos platos muy sabrosos si puedo recomendar el ardiente pollo al infierno muy delicioso. sus ojos se quemaran, su estomago estara en fuego, se quedaran en el baño por una semana, entiendes lo que digo gringo estupido tonto?"
Well, the food is coming, I can hardly wait
Now watch your fingers, careful hot plate!
What you think you're doing with my chile con queso?
Well, if you want some, just say so

Oh boy, pico de gallo
They sure don't make it like this in Ohio
No gracias, yo quiero jalepeños, nada más
You can toss away the hot sauce

?Donde estan los nachos? Holy frijole!
You better get me a bowl of guacamole
Y Uusted, Eugene? Why's your face turning green?
Don't you like pinto beans?

You want some more cinnamon crispas?
If you don't, hasta la vista
Just take the rest home in a doggie bag if you wanna
You can finish it mañana

Well, it's been a pleasure, I can't eat no more
Señor, la cuenta, por favor
If you ain't tried real Mexican cooking, well, you oughta
Just don't drink the water