Afroman Colt 45 Lyrics

Wait a minute man
Hey check this out man (tell it)
There was this blind man right, (this fool right here)(man check it, hey)
There was this blind man right(hey)
He was feelin' his way down the street with a stick right (yeah), hey
He walked past this fish market, you know what I'm sayin' (fish market?)
He stopped he took a deep breath he said
"Snfffffff, woooo good morning ladies" <all laughing>
You like that s___ man (that was pretty good)
Hey man I got a gang of that s___ man
I tell you what my man on the guitar,
Hey fool on the drums.
Everyone just gather around the mic I'll tell you all these m____ f___in' jokes but first imma start off like that, hey help me sing it homeboy (C'mon!)

Say Colt 45 and 2 zig-zags baby thats all we need
We can go to the park after dark
Smoke that tumbleweed
As the marijuana burns we can take our turn singing them dirty rap songs Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong
And sell tapes from here to Hong Kong.
So roll, roll, roll my joint pick out the seeds and stems
Feelin high as hell flyin' through Palmdale
Skatin' on ragged rims
So roll, roll, the '83 Cadilac Coupe Deville
If my tapes and my cds just don't sell i bet my (caddy) cabby will.

Well it was just sundown in small white town
They call it East Side Palmdale (well)
When the Afroman walked through the white land
Houses went up for sale (hell)
Well I was standing on the corner sellin' rap CDs
When i met a little girl name Jan
I let her ride in my caddy cause I didnt know her daddy was the leader of The Ku (klux)Kluck Klan
We f___ed on the bed
f___ed on the floor
f___ed so long I grew a f___in' afro
Then I f___ed to the left
f___ed to the right
She sucked my d___ 'til the s___ turned white
I thought to myself sheeba-sheeba
Got my a__ lookin' like a zebra
I put on my clothes and I was on my way
When her daddy pulled up in a Chevrolet
And so I ran, I jumped out the back window
But her daddy he was waitin' with a two-by-four
Oh he beat me to the left
He beat me to the right
The mother f___er wooped my a__ all night
But i aint mad at a prejudice dad
That's the best d___ p____ I ever had
I got a bag of weed and a bottle of wine
I'm gonna f___ that b____ just one more time

[CHORUS]
Colt 45 and 2 zig-zags baby that's all we need
We can go to the park, after dark
Smoke that tumbleweed
As the marijuana burn we can take our turn singin' them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong
And sell tapes from here to Hong Kong
So roll, roll, roll my joint, pick out the seeds and stems
Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdale
Skatin' on dayton rims
So roll, roll, the '83 Cadillac Coupe Deville
If my tapes and my CDs just don't sell, I bet my Cabby will

I met this lady in Hollywood
She had green hair but d___ she looked good
I took her to my house 'cause she was fine
But she whupped out a d___ that was bigger than mine

I met this lady from j__an
Never made love with an African
I f___ed her once
I f___ed her twice
I ate that p____ like shrimp-fried rice
Don't be amazed at stories I tell ya
I met a woman in the heart of Australia
Had a big b___ and big t__ties too
So I hopped in her a__ like a kangaroo

See I met this woman from Hawaii
Stuck it in her a__ and she said aaiiiii
Lips where breakfast
p____ was lunch
Then her t__ties busted open with Hawaiian punch

Met Colonel Sanders' wife in the state of Kentucky
She said I'll fry some chicken if you just f___ me
I came in her mouth it was a crisis
I gave her my secret blend of herbs and spices

I met Dolly (pardon) Parton in Tennessee
Her t__ties were filled with Hennessy
That country music really drove me crazy
But I rode that a__ and said yes Ms. Daisy

I met this lady in Oklahoma
Put that p____ in a coma

Met this lady in Michigan
I can't wait 'til I f___ that b____-again

Met a real black girl down in South Carolina
f___ed her til she turned to a white Albina

f___ed this hooker in Iowa
I f___ed her on credit, so I owe her

f___ed this girl down in Georgia
Came in her mouth, man I thought I told ya

Met this beautiful s__y ho
She just ran across the border of Mexico
Fine young thing said her name's Maria
I wrapped her up just like a hot tortilla
I wanna get married but I cant afford it
I know I'm a cry when she get deported

[CHORUS]
Colt 45 and 2 zig-zags baby that's all we need
We can go to the park, after dark
Smoke that tumbleweed
And as the marijuana burn we can take our turn
Singin' them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong
And sell tapes from here to Hong Kong

Have you ever went over a girl's house to f___
But the p____ just ain't no good
I mean you gettin' upset because you can't get her wet
Plus you in the wrong neighborhood
So you try to play it off and eat the p____
But it take her so long to c__
Then a dude walk in that's her big boyfriend
And he asks you where you from
So you wipe your mouth and you try to explain
You start talkin' real fast
But he already mad cause you f___in' his woman
So he start beatin' on you a__
Now your clothes all muddy
Your nose all b_____
Your d___ was hard but now its soft
You thought you had a girl to rock your world
Now you still gotta go jack off

[CHORUS 'til it fades]
Said Colt 45 and 2 zig-zags baby that's all we need
We can go to the park after dark smoke that...