Been Through Fire Pillow Lyrics

PILLOW

This has to be...done
I stare into s___e and pull the courage from
The guts of this gutless one
Who hides in the covers with some
Guilt I can't spit up
It's the only way, I can let it-let it out
It's the only way, I can't let it-let it out
There's no subtle way, I can let it-let it out
But I have to get it out, but I have to get it

I need to feed this, Tube I let my true self grow in
With dirty thoughts and Jesus, To clean it up and show it
Before it rots away, I can give it up but not today
I have to have an ounce of love left
To block my heart from doing all of this
Is it strong enough to stop the tips of my fingers evil grip
When the thought of stopping slips
How long till the pulse leaves your wrist?

There's only an instance
Between right and wrong
When your conscious thought
Decides which path to travel on
But what when that lines drawn
Right and wrong become one

I watch dim lights dance as your sweat beads
On smooth curves pressed on these bed sheets
Your beautiful frame, oh, how it tempts me
After tonight we will hide under dead leaves
I can't fight my way from this bag of flesh
Me inside, is a whole lot of f___ed up mess
So I decide to do what I even least expect
You gotta go but know your memory is kept

As I inch close. The time ticks slow
And I'm exposed. I sigh, sorry you'll never know

You can't pull courage from a coward
You can't pull a saint out of me
You can't handle what's ours
Your hands will be cut loose and free

You must not be tied to burdens stapled to my back
As long as I can't see your face in pain I'll make it through like that
Never understood how I couldn't stomach to see you hurt
You've seen too much and I've done too little to try and make it work
You should've stayed my pretty patient with a sacred special smile
Should've stayed afraid of me believe me I'm scarier now
While you're pleasantly asleep and calm and dreaming like a child
A pillow in my hands is about to be over your mouth
Remember when I said before the last breath I breathe
The image of your face is the last thing I wanna see
I wonder what yours was, you never thought of telling me
Here's a guess, I bet this is not what you wanted it to be

Go away, so calm and peaceful
No struggle, just let go
It's the only way to get away from what I am
It's the only way can't get away from what I am
There's no other way to get away from what I am
I am a monster that tried to make a man

I'm done...shaking and squirming has now become
A sudden lull with no trace of blood
The suffocation, so gently performed
Why I did this, I'm still not sure
I couldn't watch me drag you-drag you down too
I stood and watched me drag you-drag you down too
I stopped and watched me drag you-drag you down to
Where you started off when the world was held perfect by you