Adam Sandler Mayor of Pussy Town Lyrics

Yo it's 2004 and all you candy a__es thinkin ya'll real p____es
ya'll ain't seen s___ yet
eh yo man let em know
Oh yeah, guess who's back
it's the mother f___in p____ with the little n______
don't care about cheddar or the paper chase
i'm a f___in grown man with zits on my face
a straight up chicken s___
a pansy a__ punk
If i'm if i'm guarding your a__ it's an automatic slam dunk
while thugs are at the party bustin all ya'lls a__es
I'm hidin in the corner wonderin where the f___'s my glasses
Can't afford no rims my wip's a bucket
my f___in d___'s so small no b____ can suck it
I don't pop 9's i got weak rhymes
back in 9 duce i got p___ed on 10 times
I roll solo i ain't got no clue
i said please don't hit me more than a cow says moo
afraid of heights i'm a-scared in the dark
i walk an extra 3 miles to avoid crazy f___s in the park
denied by the bloods, turned down by the crypts
my f___in auntie kicked my a__ and she got 2 plastic hips (o0 s___)
when i step to the club feel free to stare me down
because I just got re-elected the mayor of p____town
May-or-of-pus-sy-town
When bangers hit the street i stay home and watch tv
slumped out on the couch so no one can see
unless I hear somebody knockin on my door
then you'll see me crawlin cross the mother f___in floor
i've been a f___in coward every day of my life,
that's why I pretend I don't know everyone's banging my wife
i won't sit on the porch, i don't want no trouble
i'm more afraid of goin out than the f___in boy in a bubble
when the s___ goes down i make a break so fast
look like a mother f___in rocket goin past
searchin for the sneakiest place to hide
straight into the ladies room, ain't got no pride
slippin slidin, runnin hidin
you know d___ well it's a scooter i'm ridin
oh no here we go, out come the glocks
i take off so fast i pop out my socks
you gonna f___ with me, i'll cry then run
i called the cops when i got shot with a f___in squirt gun
He clams up he shuts down
His pants he almost s___s
He'll even look the other way if you grab his grandma's t__s
well I had a little poodle but neighbor's stoled her
i'd shoot her with an ak but the kick hurts my shoulder
i can't pop no gun and i can't fist fight
hell i'm afraid to take out the f___in garbage at night
I use the steps in the pool cause i'm terrified to dive
don't f___ with my floaties they's whats keepin me alive, b____
never drank remy never delt crack
one time I smoked weed i had a panic attack
if you're looking for my d___ in the mens locker room
just bring your binoculars with a f___in super zoom
naw i'm just playin i don't f___in change in there
the one time I did got my bush sprayed off with nair
but did I stick up for myself no f___in doubt
i did what i do best, i broke the f___ out
i ain't lookin at you i ain't tryin to front
it's aight with me you called my jimmy a c___
freakin sneakin crawlin creepin
when the gangs are bangin i'm in the basement sleepin
i'm straight from the streets seen trouble in every side
when the s___ hits the fan i throw on a f___in disguise
fake nose fake wig fake beard
it all worked pretty good
sometimes I just use a map and a funny accent
and pretend I got lost in the hood mother f___er
now all you coward mother f___ers out there
walkin round with your head hangin low
just cause you ate one d___
just know
my man the mayor, had to suck off his whole high school
case closed
May-or-of-pus-sy-town