Weird Al Yankovic Will The Real Slim Shady Please Shut Up Lyrics

May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will that b*tch Slim Shady please shut up?
I repeat, will that b*tch Slim Shady please shut up?
We're gonna have a problem here.

Y'all act like ya never heard a white person before,
Rhymes are poor, 14 minutes are up, so I got one more,
I had to come back, and now I'm worse than before,
I make you snore, 'cause my tired song is boring you.
It's the return of the... oh wait, hold on, don't try that,
Ya heard what he sounds like, ya really gonna buy that?
Hey, Dr. Dre does... everything you idiot!
How would I sound if Dre didn't lay the beats down?
The world has had enough, Eminem sounding like a 12 year-old girl on helium,
Look at him! Walking around trying to kiss Dre's a__,
Tyring to impress you. "He's so weak, though".
I gave Christina a blast on my new CD, 'cause I tried to hit on her and she rejected me,
Sometimes I wanna jump on the stage and just let loose,
But I can't 'cause I sound like the squirrel on Bulwinkle the Moose.

This song gets on your nerves, this song gets on your nerves,
I know I'm lucky 'cause I got more fame than I deserve,
And that's the message I've been trying to give to little kids,
You can be famous and never know what talent is.
Of course they're gonna like me, cause I'm like a cartoon,
Version of Ricky Schroeder when he was on 'Silver Spoons'.
I ain't nothin' but a product, packaged to be bought up,
You know a year from now I won't be thought of,
But I write about dead animals and cannibals,
'cause that'll shock people and sell records... man, I hope.
So if I can be ridiculous and talentless,
I guess no one is hopeless, look how bad this song is!

I'm Slim Shady, and yes, I'm real grating,
I talk like Peter Brady, and it's irritating,
I know you're saying Slim Shady please shut up,
Please shut up.