Strapping Young Lad Happy Camper (Carpe B.U.M.) Lyrics

You pretentious f___ing losers
You've got nothing at all
You've got your fingers in your a__hole
And your hand on the call
And you talk such f___ing horseshit
That it's hard to believe
That you almost make careers out of being naive

You, you are a f___er coz you sold my guitar
You, you are a f___er, seeking fortune in bars
You, you are a f___er, coz you say such stupid s___
I've got a better line in pocket lint

Than what you've done with it

So if you are an a__hole who pretends to be a friend
Then get your a__ in music, you'll be set to the end, ending,
And now you've got the nerve to ask me about my temper?
Why yes, I have become a f___ing happy camper!

I hate your f___ing faces and your trendy cut hair,
I hate the fact you think your job will go anywhere
Because it's use is just the same as what I s___ into the bowl
Just like the mess between your ears is like the mess in my hole

I hate your loser friends who only come out when it's right
I hate that when it's down you run instead of fight
I'm set to think you lot in life to test the stronger ones
Will just require some chicken s___ and also sneakers for the run.

I dig it away, the s___ you puked instead of swallowed,
In an attempt to try and find the d___ instead of the load,
So when you move and stand aside my mood will hamper,
And yes, I will become a f___ing happy camper!

Stuck in endless winter with your press to keep you sane
Wait for useless numbers to grow useful once again

Where the heat will come again, your flaw grows sick,
Your flaw will send, the s___ you call your business

To the place that is your end

Stuck in the winter, cold and wet,
Your stupid friends have come and went
And you've left behind your idiot job,
And it's far from a prize, you f___ing d___

...your'e a f___ing d___... yeah!
...how's this for punk? d___!!!

...suck my c___, you pathetic excuse for a human being...
You're a neurotic, h___phobic, racist dork... you've also got a lot
Of b____ to d___ with someone else's life, you f___ing pseudo ghetto
"boy in the hood" middle class white spoiled rotten bored "gangsta"
Wanna-be hunk of regenerated red neck bullshit! thank christ you don't
Have to rely on that staggering intellect or dynamic personality to
Intimidate others, s___ for brains. shut the f___ up, and get out of
Your parent's house and get a real job, you putz, and for god's sake,
Quit being such a f___ing sheep!!! now grow the hell up!!!... d___.

I let it get me down because you're in it for the glory
And I'd rather leave with reason than go dying for a story
And this whole l.a. rock thing

That the malls are buying up
It doesn't work, it doesn't work,
It's so inbred I might throw up...

And now I'm put into the middle

With the contracts and the bunk, and I always end up

Hearing "hey, man, punk... let's have more punk!"
So here I am to do a favour, save some hassle kiss and tell,
That either way my music's s___ and it ain't ever going to sell

So if you've got the gall to take this s___ blown up your a__
And youv'e got the cash and b____ to pump the same c___ out in mass
Then hell, I'll stand aside and with your plans I'll never tamper
I'll sit and write you songs and be a f___ing happy camper.

Yeah, send me out a contract and in clauses you will lurk
The smaller points so I can give it all and save you work
You say an album's not an album without issues left to hamper...
Well then, f___,
...I guess I am a f___ing
...happy
...f___ing
...camper.