Yeah, I'm such a liar
One time I told you
You were the highlight
Of all of my s__ual life

While I'm confessing
When you're undressing
I was picking the lock
On your safe with my knife
Einstein

If you're so naive
That you believe
Everything I said to you
Well, I got your s__
And wrote you rubber checks
Well, what did you think
I was gonna do

My reputation for exaggeration
It never got to you
That's why I left Duluth
Sometimes I stretch the truth

My dearest darling
You know that luggage
It belonged to the blond
With the really nice pair
And incidentally
I sorely missed you
The pain was so hard to bear

If I would rate you
Not that I hate you
But you would end up
Eighth, maybe ninth in your class

Your build is hot now
If you could use your
Brain like you use your a__

Oh, you're so naive
How could you believe
Everything I said to you

My reputation for exaggeration
It never got to you
Sometimes I'm so uncouth
Sometimes I stretch the truth

Hey, I'm such a liar
One time I told you
You were the highlight
Of all of my s__ual life

I'm remarkably insincere
Incredibly insincere
Totally insincere
Oh don't take it so hard, my dear
I'm consistently insincere

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