too short cocktales Lyrics

David's c___tales
These are the tales the freaky tales
these are the tails that I tell so well if u don't like my dirty raps you can go 2 hell
cuz short dogs on the mic telling c___tails
H-E-A-D,
All you washed up hoes tryin to throw that P
You're just a big freak, you better not complain,
When you hear these c___tails and you hear your name.
If you a fake b____, ain't no thing
I'll pick up the phone and call Janine.
If I call Marie, I know for a fact
ill get f___ed in my drop top cadillac
I met this freak named Naomi
Straight d___ sucker worked me and my homie.
She had a girlfriend, her name was Vicki
I pulled her to the side and let her suck my d___.
She was fine as f___, but can't f___ with Tina
Tina, Tina, the sperm cleana.
I took her to my house and told her strip
Baby got freaky-started doing the splits.
I said, "b_____!!! Do what you want
Cause this true blue mack won't even front".
I f___ed her with my finger, she tried to c__
p____ so tight, it wouldn't give me none
I'm Too $hort baby couldn't be no punk
I'm trying to get freaky cause I love the funk
My d___ is big and her n____ had a little one,
I didn't f___ her freaky a__, but it was still fun.
I know you stop and wonder just what it is..
It's the California lifestyle that I live.
See im from the crew dangerous b____
telling everybody about this freaky s___
I know this girl named Annette
Get her all alone and she'll suck your d___
Hella freaky...won't say no for s___
You and her all alone, n____ that's your b____.
I know another freak her name's Joanne
I always get the p____ cuz I know I can
Finest b____ around, ain't got no man
Everytime she cross my mind I go f___ her again.
She's like another freak named Christina
b____ so dumb, I named her misdemeanor
Cuz it had to be a crime to be that dumb
I took her to my house and she let me c__ in her mouth
You know I did all that s___
She got my number, if she beep me, I'm gonna call that b____,
And go dig in them guts like a gardener,
If she starts screamin', I'm gonna f___ the b____ harder.
Cause these are the tales, the freaky tales
These are the tales I tell so well
You don't like my dirty raps you can go to hell
Cuz Short Dogg's on the mike tellin' c___tails.
I meet the groupies, hookers like Kathy,
f___ing M.C.'s cause she's so nasty,
See her backstage trying to throw that a__,
She just like the freaks and she had to pass me that p____
You can't stop the b____
Let her roll on volls then I drop the b____
My name is Shorty my game is long
I freak these hoes and sing these songs.
I know b____ named Stephanie
Do anything she can to have s__ with me
She really don't bring out the best in me
But I love her fine a__ laying next to me.
She's like another freak named Nicole
So d___ sprung on my diamonds and gold
I took her to my house, she gave me the panties
I f___ed her so good she told her friend named Angie.
Angie called me up about two weeks later
Talking some s___ about do me player
So I did her just like Tamara,
Taking naked pictures with my poloroid camera.
Next they told a b____ named Rocquelle
Got my skin all under her fingernails
She was diggin in my back while I grind the s___
That was way back now I can't find the b____
But if I do, I'll probably do the same again
Break the b____ for everything cuz I came to pimp.
I'm Too Short baby, I don't stop mackin
I grab the microphone and I don't stop rappin
You can bet your life as I spit these raps
I'll be f___ing em' up like that...b____.
I know another trick her name was Shery,
I had to cut her loose cuz she wanted to get married
p____ so good and I do mean very...
SOmetimes it's shaved and sometimes it's hairy.
I'm Short Dogg ain't nothing nice
You ever make me mad and I'll f___ your wife
Have fun with your b____ and have her sprung on my d___.
I guess I'll pull it out and just c__ on your b____
Like my other little tramp named Erika
ANywhere I want to f___ that's where I f___
Cuz she's the freakiest b____ in America
and Everytime I get the p____ I just tear it up....
Cuz these are the tales the freaky tales
These are the tales that I tell so well
You don't like my dirty raps you can go to hell
Cuz Short Dogg is on the mike telling c___tales!!!!!!!!!