Afroman Cult 45 Lyrics

wait a minute man
check this out man
tell it
it was this blind man right?
it was this blind man right?
he was feeling his way down this street with this stick right?
hey, he walked past this fish market you know what I'm saying?
fish market?
he stop
he took a deep breath
he said (breath) Woo!
good monin' ladies!
You like that s___ man?
that pretty good!
Yah but I got a gang of that s___ man!
I tell you what, man on tha gitar'
hey fool on the drum
hey every body crowd 'round
while I tell ya all these mother f___in' jokes
first let me start it off like this
hey help me sing it home boy
Come On!

Say a colt 45 and
two zig zags
baby thats all we need
we can go to the bar
count the dawgs
smoke that tumble weed
as the marijuana burn
we can take our turn
singin' them dirty rap songs
stop and hit the bong
like Cheech and Chong
say it takes from here to Hong Kong
so Roll roll roll my joint
pick out the seeds and stilfs
feelin' high as hell
flyin' through Pondale
skatin' on beggin' riffs
so roll roll the 83'
cadillac coup de ville
if my tapes and my cd's just don't sell
i bet my caddy will

well it was just sun down in a small white town
they call it eastside pondale
well!?
When the afroman walked through the white land
houses went up for sell
Hell!?
I was standin' on the corner sellin' rap cd's
when I met a little girl named Jan
Jan?!
I let her ride in my caddi
'cuz I didn't know her daddy
was the leader of the klu klux klan
we f___ed on the bed
f___ed on the floor
f___ed so long I grew a f___in' afro
then I f___ed to the left
Left!
f___ed to the right
Right!
she sucked my d___ till the s___ turned white
I thought to myself Sheba Sheba!
got my a__ lookin' like a zebra
I put on my clothes and I was on my way
until her daddy pulled up in his Chevrolet
an' so I ran
I jumped out the back window
but her daddy
he was waitin' with a 2 x 4
ohh!
He beat me to the left
He beat me to the right
that mother f___er whooped my a__ all night!
but I ain't mad
at her predjudice dad
thats the best d___ p____ I ever had

I got a bag of weed and a bottle of wine
lemme f___ that b____ just one more time

colt 45 and
two zig zags
baby thats all we need
Come on
we can go to the bar
count the dawgs
smoke that tumble weed
as the marijuana burn
we can take our turn
singin' them dirty rap songs
stop and hit the bong
like Cheech and Chong
say it takes from here to Hong Kong
so Roll roll roll my joint
pick out the seeds and stilfs
feelin' high as hell
flyin' through Pondale
skatin' on beggin' riffs
Come On
so roll roll the 83'
cadillac coup de ville
if my tapes and my cd's just don't sell
i bet my caddy will

I met this lady in Hollywood
she had green hair but d___ she looked good!
I took her to my house 'cuz she was fine
but she whooped out a d___ that was bigger than mine

I met this lady from j__an
never made love with an African
I f___ed her once
Once!
I f___ed her twice
Twice!
I ate that p____ like shrimp fried rice

Don't be amazed at the stories I tell ya
Tell Ya!
met a woman in the heart of Australia
had a big b___ and big t__ties too
so I hopped in her a__ like a kangaroo

See I met this woman from HAWAII! stuck it in her a__
and she said AIII!!
Lips was breakfast
p____ was lunch
then her t__ties busted open with Hawaiian punch

met Corn Sanders wife in the state of Kentucky
she said I brought some chicken if you just f___ me
I came in her mouth it was a Crisis
I gave her my secret blend of herbs and spices

colt 45 and
two zig zags
baby thats all we need
we can go to the bar
count the dawgs
smoke that tumble weed
as the marijuana burn
we can take our turn
singin' them dirty rap songs
stop and hit the bong
like Cheech and Chong
say it takes from here to Hong Kong

Hey wait a minute man check this out

I met Dolly Parten in Tennesee
her t__ties were filled with henicee
that country music really drove me crazy
but i rode that a__ and said
Yes! Miss Daisy!

Met this lady in Oklahoma
put that p____ in a coma

Met this lady in Michigan
I can't wait till I f___ that b____ again

Met a real black girl down in South Carolina
f___ed her till she turned to a white Albina'

f___ed this Hooker in Iowa
I f___ed her on credit so I owe her

f___ed this girl down in Georgia
Came in her mouth
Man! I thought I told Ya!

Met this beautiful s__y hoe
She just ran 'cross the border of Mexico
Fine young thing Said her name's Maria
I wrapped her up just like a hot tortilla
I wanna get married but I can't afford it
I know I'm a cry when she get deported

colt 45 and
two zig zags
baby thats all we need
we can go to the bar
count the dawgs
smoke that tumble weed
and as the marijuana burn
we can take our turn
singin' them dirty rap songs
stop and hit the bong
like Cheech and Chong
say it takes from here to Hong Kong

hey wait a minute man
have you ever went over a girl you sought to f___
but the p____ just ain't no good?!
SAY WHAT?!
I mean you gettin' upset
'cuz you can't get her wet
plus you're in the wrong neighborhood
so you try to play it off and eat the p____
but it take her so long to c__b
SAY WHAT!?
then a dude walk in that's her big boyfriend
and he asks you where you from
so you wipe your mouth and you try to explain
you start talking real fast
but already mad cuz you f___ing his wife
so he start beating on your a__
now your clothes all muddy
your nose all b_____
your d___ was hard but now its soft
WHAT!
you thought you had a girl to rock your world
now you still gotta go jack off

Say a Colt 45
and two zig zags
Baby thats all we need
(Fades into background)