Kevin Bloody Wilson Hey Santa Claus Lyrics

quite often i get to thinkin how as kids we got by
like at christmas time at our place we couldnt even afford a fire
but we made due with what we had then when i was young
dad used to suck a peppermint and we'd sit around his tongue
we couldnt afford no sparkly tinsel for our christmas tree
so wed just wheel our grandad in and make the old c___ sneeze
(wheel him around the other side nana)
thing change pretty b_____ quick
ive got kids now of my own
and i heard then unwrap their pressies
last night when i got home

Hey Santa claus you c___!

Where's me f___ing bike?

I've unwrapped all this other junk and there's nothing that I like.

I wrote you a f___ing letter and I come to see you twice

Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me f___ing bike.

If I wanted a pair of b_____ thongs, I'd have b_____ asked.

And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your a___!

You've stuffed me b_____ order up

It's enough to make you spew

And I'm not the only one who's snakey

Me sisters dirty too!

(female voice)
Hey santa clause you c___!

Where's me f___ing pram?

You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am.

'Cause I'm the little girl who you made sit right on your hand

I'll give you f___ing ho ho ho

You forgot me f___ing pram

(male voice)
Next time I come to see ya, I'm gonna punch you in the guts

And I'll let your f___ing reihndeer loose and kick Rudolf in the nuts!

You just wait 'till next year, when you go to that store

And me and me little sister, come stomping through the door

And we'll say, yeah you wait for it

Hey mums and dads you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes

And don't listen to him boys and girls 'cause he tells f___ing lies

He's just a p___ tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright

'Cause the old f___ing w___er Forgot me f___ing bike.

You wait you old c___, I'm gonna dob you in

Tell me old man on you, he's gonna punch your f___ing lights out

'I saw mummy sucking santa clause'