Todd Snider Joe's Blues + Seattle Grunge Lyrics

You can't groove on dope
You can't groove on wine
If you're trying to catch a groove on tv, man, you're wasting your time
Well you can't do what you want, you won't get far
You know the only way to groove is on a bass guitar

You find a loose bit of rhythm
Then you lock in tight
Yes you roll on it over and over till it sounds just exactly right
You can learn to sing lead if you need to be a star
But the only way to groove is on a bass guitar

It fills out the bottom, dirty and mean
Down right greasy when the sound man's clean
The eyes in the room, they all lookin' at the star
The b___s are all shakin' to the bass guitar

You could dress real cool
And wear dark shades
You might be sleek, sharp, and shiney just like a razor blade
You drive around town in a long black car
But the only way to groove is on a bass guitar

It fills out the bottom, dirty and mean
Down right grunge when the sound guy's clean
The eyes in the room, they's all lookin' at the star
The b___s are all shakin' to the bass guitar

Spoken:
Play it for me one time my brother
You know me friend the good doctor Joe Murrey brought me this song
He told me it was the perfect country and western song
I told him it was not the perfect country and western song
'Cuz it didn't mention momma, it didn't mention trucks, hell, it didn't even have a country beat
It's more of a jazz thing and it's about bass
I donno what he's talking about
Check him out though, he's good
Joe, do something

Yes, you can do what you want

Hey, hey, my, my, rock 'n' roll will never die,
Just hang your hair down in your eyes
You'll make a million dollars.
Well, I was in this band goin' nowhere fast
We sent out demos, but everybody passed

So one day, we finally took the plunge
Moved out to Seattle to play some grunge.
Washington State that is.
s___e Needle ...Eddie Vedder ...mud 'n' honey!
Now to fit in fast, we wear flannel shirts,
We turn our amps up until it hurts,
We got bad attitudes, and what's more
When we play we stare straight down at the floor, wow-ee
Pretty scary.
How pensive ...how totally alternative.
Now to fit in on the Seattle scene
We gotta do somethin' they ain't never seen.
So, thinkin' up a gimmick one day
We decided to be the only band that wouldn't play -- a note.
Under any circumstances.
Silence ...music's original alternative.
Roots grunge...
Well we spread the word through the underground,
that we were the hottest new thing in town.
The record guy came out to see us one day,
and just like always, we didn't play; it knocked him out.
He said he loved our work.
He said he loved our work, but he wasn't sure if he could sell a record
with nothin' on it.
I said tell 'em we're from Seattle.
He advanced us two-and-a-half million dollars.
Hey, hey, my, my, rock 'n' roll will never die,
Hang your hair down in your eyes
You'll make a million dollars.
Well, they made us do a video, but that wasn't tough,
'Cause we just filmed ourselves smashin' stuff.
It was kinda weird, 'cause there was no music,
But MTV said they'd love to use it.
The kids went wild, the kids went nuts,
Rolling Stone gave us a five-star review; said we played with guts.
We were scorin' chicks, takin' drugs,
then we got asked to play MTV Unplugged; you shoulda seen it.
We went right out there and refused to do acoustical versions of the
electrical songs that we had refused to record in the first place.
Then we smashed our s___.
Well, we blew 'em away at the Grammy show,
by refusin' to play and refusin' to go.
And then just when we thought fame would last forever,
Along come this band that wasn't even together.
Now, that's alternative ...hell, that's alternative to alternative.
I feel stupid ...and contagious.
Well our band got dropped, and that ain't funny,
'cause we're all hooked on drugs, but we're outta money
So the other day I called up the band,
I said, "Boys, I've taken all I can,
"Shave off your goatees, pack the van...
"We're goin' back to
Athens."