Ray Stevens Along Came Jones Lyrics

I plopped down in my easy chair and I turned on a Channel 2
A bad gunslinger named a Salty Sam was a chasin' poor Sweet Sue
He trapped her in the old sawmill and said with an evil laugh,
If you don't give me the deed to your ranch
I'll saw you all in half!
And then he grabbed her (Help, he grabbed me)
He tied her up (help he's tying me up oh)
He turned on the buzzsaw (he's turnin on the buzz saw help)

(chorus):
And then along came Jones
Tall thin Jones
Slow-walkin' Jones
Slow-talkin' Jones
Along came long, lean, lanky Jones

Commercial came on, so I got up to fix myself a snack
You should've seen what was goin' on by the time that I got back
Down in the old abandoned mine, Sweet Sue was havin' fits
That villain said Give me the deed to your ranch
Or I'll blow you all to bits!
And then he grabbed her (help, he grabbed me help)
He tied her up (he's tying me up again help)
He lit the fuse to the dynamite (he lit the fuse to the dynamite, Help help)

(chorus)
And then along came Jones
Tall thin Jones
Slow-walkin' Jones
Slow-talkin' Jones
Along came long, lean, lanky Jones

I got so bugged I turned it off and turned on another show
But there was the same old shoot-'em-up and the same old rodeo
Salty Sam was a tryin' to stuff Sweet Sue in a burlap sack
He said If you don't give me the deed to your ranch
I'll throw you on the railroad track!
And then he grabbed her (help he's grabbing me again
He tied her up (here we go again, tying me up)
He threw her on the railroad tracks
A train started comin' (Oh, here come the train! here come the train. Oh help, help help)

(chorus)
And then along came Jones
Tall thin Jones
Slow-walkin' Jones
Slow-talkin' Jones
Along came long, lean, lanky Jones
Along came long, lean, lanky Jones
Along came long, lean, lanky Jones